This article uses debates surrounding teachers' in loco parentis position to explore the social and cultural responses to school corporal punishment in post-1945 English schools. Analysing materials produced by educators and campaigners, it argues that retentionists conceived of their right to inflict physical chastisement as one based on an imagined and discursive status as a parent. This was challenged by opponents who stressed not only the severity of the practice but sought to directly counter the view that parental rights should be automatically delegated to teachers. Whilst the abolition of corporal punishment was ultimately a consequence of an ECHR ruling, it is suggested that it can also be read as the culmination of a longer shift in the status and forms of parental rights in twentieth-century Britain.